We was long distance relationship, hense why i am speaking in english
I loved him
He had to undergo an operation, they told him they could do it right that second
I didnt get to spend any time with him that day
He told me see you tomorrow
And i waited and then tomorrow came. I have anxiety, so it was kicking in. I cried, spammed him, got reassured.
Then, me and a friend tried to search. And then i found this website with his obituary. In my heart i wish it was someone else. But all his details were right. I broke down.
It hurts me, i didnt get a message. His mom knew he was dating a girl far away. I know she must be hurting. I just wish i had found out. I want to know what happened. We was going to meet this week. I am so mad. So hurt. I miss him. It hurts me that he died alone. I wasnt there. We had plans. I wish to attend his funeral. But that probably won't happen. I dont know how to get into contact with his parents. I am mad he never gave contact information. I really wanted to give him his present. That will never happen.
I miss him so much. I have never felt this way for someone i met that is so long distance. It hurts me i never got the chance to see him. I am not mad at not being able to get information. I wish i did than to find it here.... i wish to get into contact with his family... but i don't see it happening....
I love you markus scherm, i love you most. Goodnight.
Tamara, your queen