• We was long distance relationship, hense why i am speaking in english


    I loved him

    Markus

    He had to undergo an operation, they told him they could do it right that second


    I didnt get to spend any time with him that day


    He told me see you tomorrow

    And i waited and then tomorrow came. I have anxiety, so it was kicking in. I cried, spammed him, got reassured.


    Then, me and a friend tried to search. And then i found this website with his obituary. In my heart i wish it was someone else. But all his details were right. I broke down.


    It hurts me, i didnt get a message. His mom knew he was dating a girl far away. I know she must be hurting. I just wish i had found out. I want to know what happened. We was going to meet this week. I am so mad. So hurt. I miss him. It hurts me that he died alone. I wasnt there. We had plans. I wish to attend his funeral. But that probably won't happen. I dont know how to get into contact with his parents. I am mad he never gave contact information. I really wanted to give him his present. That will never happen.


    I miss him so much. I have never felt this way for someone i met that is so long distance. It hurts me i never got the chance to see him. I am not mad at not being able to get information. I wish i did than to find it here.... i wish to get into contact with his family... but i don't see it happening....


    I love you markus scherm, i love you most. Goodnight.


    Tamara, your queen

  • Dear Tamara,

    a warm welcome to our forum. Please accept my deep-felt condolences for your loss.

    Be sure that we all understand you and share your feelings of grief, miss and love. We all experienced the same – in different circumstances but the result is the same. We all have lost the most loved person of our life.

    The circumstances under which you got to know the sad news are tragic. To loose contact with your loved one and then after days getting to know that he died is especially painful. I am so sorry for you.

    But please see that also for his parents his sudden death must have been a shock and they are struggling with the situation. Perhaps they do not know how to contact you, have no contact details such as you do. I think you did right to leave your mail address in the obituary, this gives them the chance to contact you.

    I wish with all my heart that you will hear from his parents.

  • i know, i feel so much grief for them. I dont blame them. I really dont blame them. I dont know who made the orbitary. I do see that. I always tell him to say hi to his mom when has calls. Is there any way to contact the person who made the orbitary? I am unsure if they will see my message. I dont blame them. I really dont. I just feel so much right now. I dont know how else to get into contact with them.... i say send a letter to his address but they might not open it... i wont get any closure... all i keep yhinking3 about all the things he has said and i dont know how to cope. The only thing that comforts me is that he has found love in the last few weeks


    I wish this orbitary was someone else i really do, as nasty as that sounds but it isnt.

    I dont know if the rose would actually be sent to them......i really want someone to contact me



  • Dear Tamra,


    also from me a warm welcome to this forum.

    My deepest condolences to You Tamara. Those who ever lost a dear one,

    knows how you feel. I will write a letter of condolence to the parents, I think they will open ist.


    all my love to you Maike

  • How do you write a letter to the parents? Do you know how to?

  • Dear Tamara,


    feel so sorry for what happened to you.


    Did I understand right, that you don't have any contact informations about the parents?

    Aren't there any common friends?


    I really understand your great despair.


    Was he a German? Maybe the registration office could help you.


    A hug


    Lotte

  • I think Maike means that you should write a letter to the parents. If you have Markus address, do it - I am sure they will open it.

    Oh that makes sense

    I only have his address

    He doesnt live with his parents


    This sucks i just wish there was something i could do

    i will try writing a letter, hope they open it

    I think they know english

  • No, he never gave me any contact, makes me so mad that he just didnt give to me in case of emergency

    Like this

    I met him online, as lame as that sounds, i just have to hope they chrck the rose thing on the orbituary or try what is suggester and write a letter and hope they read it, as i assume they will need to get into his place



    I feel so useless

  • He is austrian, how would i contact the registration office?

  • I think the a.m. idea of Sunny is the easiest way to get in contact. (maybe you have s.o. to translate your letter in short, german sentences?)


    Otherwise you can google his hometown and the registration office (Einwohnermeldeamt) to get some contact informations. Probable his parents live in the same city.

  • I think the a.m. idea of Sunny is the easiest way to get in contact. (maybe you have s.o. to translate your letter in short, german sentences?)


    Otherwise you can google his hometown and the registration office (Einwohnermeldeamt) to get some contact informations. Probable his parents live in the same city.

    My Significant other is the one who died, i will tty and see if this works, if not, im going to have to deal with no contact....

  • Dear Tamara! My heartfelt condolences to your great loss!:30:

    I think it´s a good idea to write a letter to his parents! I´m sure they will read the letter !

    I really hope you will get an answer oft them!

    Big hug, Andrea

    i am trying so hard. I have wrote a letter, but i felt like i made it all about me.... im not very good... we played a game together and everyone is sad and we made like vigils for him... i would love to show this to them, to show he was loved.


    I fear if i sent a letter, it can only be to his address and feel like it would get there too latex you know in case they packed up his things already, or they might not read it... they knew about me, i know theyre grieving too, i dont blame them, i just wonder, why no one tried to contact me? Does he have a password to his laptop so they cant get on discord.

    I feel so loss.


    I emailed the austrian place that someone suggested, i dont know if ill get information from there because he never gave me details on his family.... maybe its my fault, i never thought to ask because i never thought this would happen and i would have plenty of time to learn...


    I have so many regrets. So many frustrations. So depressed. He was the one who could calm me down or make me feel happy. Of course i dont rely on him to do that, just he really meant a lot to me. I think about the things he said before he had to go, it makes me so upset. And mad at rhe doctors. What did they do? Its no ones fault, they tried. Maybe his body gave up.


    This is why i need to get someone to contact me. I cant bear all these questions. I just fear i will never get it. I tried my best.

  • Dear Tamara! I understand you well because you have no contact information from his parents and you don´t know what really happened!

    Unfortunately I think, there is only this possibility to write a letter to the parents! I´m sure they will read the letter!

    You will certainly also get an answer from the Austrian registration office!

    I really hope for you that you get the answers you are missing!:30:

  • Dear Tamara, I am sure that they will get the letter and read it. Marcus died only 4 days ago, so it is unlikely that they have already packed all his things and gave off his place. Don't worry, they will get your letter. In Germany and also in Austria, it is customs that you give a so called "forwarding order" to the post to have any letters to be sent to another address when someone moves or dies. So, even when they do not have his place anymore (which is unlikely), the letters addressed to him will find their way to the parents. And don't worry about what you wrote. It is normal that it is a lot about you and I think this is good. So his parents get to know you a bit better and know a bit better how your relationship to Marcus was. Maybe they do not know much about it. I think that they do not know how to contact you or are not very familiar with a computer. Your letter will help.

    As I said, if you want me to help with a translation to German, here I am. You can send the letter via personal conversation if you want.

    A big hug.